The meaning of Al-Hilm is the ability to restrain oneself and to control one's nature from anger or hasty action. Among its opposites are Al-Batsh (violence or aggression), Al-Jahl (ignorance) and As-Safah (foolishness, incompentency). Al-Hilm also includes patience, deliberateness, kindness and calm in spite of possessing strength.
It also means to be forgiving and to cover the faults of others. Another noun from this word is one of the names of Allah Most High: Al-Haleem. Allah said:
{Laa yu'aakhidhukum Allah bi al-laghwi fiy aimaanikum wa laakin yu'aakhidhukum bima kasabat quloobukum wa Allah ghafoorun haleem.}
{Allah does not take you to account for idle talk in your oaths. Rather, He takes you to account for what your hearts have earned. And Allah is forgiving, forbearing.} Al-Baqara: 225
As Allah is haleem, he demands hilm of us in our interacting with each other with all of its components: patience, kindness, deliberateness and restraint. Allah said:
{Qaulun ma'roofun wa maghfiratun khairun min sadaqatin yatba'uha adhaa. Wa Allah ghaniyun haleem.}
{A good word and forgiveness is better than a charity followed by hurt. And Allah is wealthy, forbearing.} Al-Baqarah: 263
Part of ihsaan - the state which every Muslim aspires to - includes restraining ones anger and being forbearing and forgiving with others. Allah said:
{Alladheena yunfiqoona fiy as-sarraa'i wa adh-dharraa'i wa al-kadhimeena al-ghaidha wa al-'aafeena 'an an-nbaas wa Allah yuhibbu al-muhsineen.}
{Those who give in easy times and in hard times and those who restrain their rage and those who are forgiving of others - and Allah loves the people of ihsaan.} Aal-'Imraan: 134
Sometimes, the only way to maintain hilm is to stay away from people who lack it. Otherwise, they may drag you to their level. Every Muslim should seek out companions who pull him in a good direction, not those who drag them down into bad character. Allah said:
{Khudh al-'afwa wa'mur bi al-'urfi wa a'ridh 'an al-jaahileen.}
{Take the easy and command what is right and turn away from the ignorant.} Al-A'raaf: 199
{Take the easy...} Demand of them what is easy for them in terms of sadaqa (this was before the commandment of Zakat) and character. Do not impose on them that which is difficult for them. The Prophet (sas) said:
"Yassiroo wa laa tu'assiroo wa bash-shiroo wa laa tunaffiroo"
"Make ease and do not make difficulty and give glad tidings and do not repel."
{...and command what is right...} At the same time, we must enjoin upon people the ma'roof. Al-ma'roof literally means "that which is known". It's meaning here is all that which Allah has commanded and ordered us to do (as well as staying away from what He has prohibited). So, this is the boundary for the previous phrase: we must seek to be as forbearing as possible with people and make things easy for them, but WITHIN the bounds of Al-ma'roof, because commanding what is right and forbidding what is wrong is an obligation upon every Muslim. Being forbearing and easy with people is the STYLE with which that obligation should be carried out.
{...and turn away from the ignorant.} If you have established the clear evidence and performed the commanding of right and the forbidding or wrong to the best of your ability but they have not done it, then turn away from them and do not dispute further with them and do not respond to their foolishness in kind.
How could we not show hilm to our fellow Muslims when Allah has so much of it in store for us. A mere good deed done for the sake of Allah can lead to rewards many times over the magnitude of the deed along with the forgiving and erasing of some of our bad deeds. This is part of Allah's attribute of Al-Haleem. Allah said:
{In tuqridhoo Allaha qardhan hasanan yudhaa'ifhu lakum wa yaghfir lakum wa Allahu shakoorun haleemun.}
{If you loan Allah a good loan He will multiply it for you and forgive you and Allah is very thankful, very forbearing.} At-Taghaabun: 17
A Muslim should always have compassion (Ar-Rifq) in all affairs. The Prophet (sas) said:
"Inna Allaha rafeequn yuhibbu ar-rifqa fiy al-'amri kullihi."
"Allah is compassionate, He loves compassion in all affairs." Muslim & Bukhari
"Inna ar-rifqa laa yakuna fiy shai'in illa zaanahu wa laa yunza'a min shai'in illa shaanahu."
"Commpassion does not become part of something without making it beautiful and it is not removed from something without disgracing it." Muslim
Maturity (Al-Hilm) and knowledge (Al-'ilm) go hand in hand. Both are necessary and both support each other. Either on without the other is incomplete and does not bear the desired fruit. Umar (ra) said:
"Ta'allamu al-'ilma wa ta'allamu lil-ilmi as-sakina wa al-hilm."
"Learn the knowledge and learn for the knowledge calmness and maturity."
Al-Hassan Al-Basri said:
"Utlub al-'ilma wa zayyinoohu bil waqaari wa al-hilm."
"Seek knowledge and beautify it with dignity and maturity."
Notice that none of these great Companions, while talking about maturity and issues of character, downplayed the seeking of knowledge in the least. This is in contract to some of what we hear among the Muslims today attempting to downplay "book" learning as unimportant. On the contrary, it is just as true to say that excellent character without knowledge is useless as it is to say that knowledge without good character is useless. In fact it is more true because, as the hadith about the three types of earth tells us, one who as taken knowledge but not benefitted from it may pass it on to another who will.
When foolishness and igorance spreads among the Muslims, maintaining maturity becomes more and more of a challenge. Ali ibn Abi Talib said:
"Hilmuka 'alaa as-safeehi yukthiru ansaaraka 'alaihi."
"Your restraint with the foolish one increases your helpers against him."